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Honeydew(2021)(Review)[Weirdo Wednesday]

A young couple is stranded after their car won’t start one night and end up at a farm house with a very friendly old woman – who may or may not be senile, and who may or may not have a very dark secret. If you think you’ve heard this before, it’s because you have.

“Honeydew” is the third major outing from independent director Devereux Milburn, and it’s a very cliché, boring time. Notably starring Sawyer Spielberg (son of Steven Spielberg) in his debut role, and he certainly acts like its his first. This movie takes a very familiar set up, sprinkles in some incoherent faux-Lynch aesthetics, and saves everything it has for the final few shots which lack any punch. You are drained by watching this thing slowly play out as the couple feels something is strange, then they have weird hallucinations after eating ‘mystery meat’, and then we learn about the madness that’s ensuing.

I was very excited to see this one, but it’s a very dull portrayal of the premise. I promise you that if you imagine what this movie might be like, it’s definitely going to be better than the material that’s presented. The characters are awful – both written that way and in their performances. The ‘reveal’s are obvious and do not sting at all, and the pace is dreadfully slow. The one real positive thing I can say about this film is that the soundtrack was definitely, well, different… And the camerawork was pretty nice.

This movie has found its way onto Shudder, and I’m telling you not to waste your time. The director pushes off a vibe that instead of respectfully embracing a weird and fun idea, he is trying to make something ‘weird for the sake of being weird’, and it almost felt irresponsible to use a viewer’s time with such an underwhelming experience.

“Honeydew” may be a delicious fruit, but this one is rotten and stinkin’.

1/5 – only because of the cinematography.

‘Til Next Time,
Mike Cleopatra

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